Sunday, January 2, 2011

cant sleep

i dont know about the readers i just want to inform you that maybe i'm having insomnia here.cant sleep.same goes to a few friends of mine here.but i'm not talking to them because i'm thinking a thing which there is the reason why i cant sleep right head keep on spinning and thinking why i must be in this way for this all long?

i wonder why i keep on give troublesome to other people??i want to help but something bad else happen.this is not the first was so many time its happen.i keep on wondering am i a troublesome person??this is why i just cant sleep properly.always awake after 15 to 20 minute after sleeps.this is bad for me cause i need ENERGY to keep my job done for today starting at 8 o'clock in the morning =.=

ok back to topic.i just cant help myself to be thinking about're right.actually my head wont listen to me and it will not be shut down for tonight just because i'm thinking what i've done all this long do cause an effect to other people.yeah.i'm sorry.i'm not a perfect person here.

maybe my action by thinking too much in negative way infect my action and have hurt the people that i barely love with.its not a good news if people who you love with is being trouble by your action.i want to fix this thing back again.but she didn't let me to do that.i just dont know why.i just dont want the situation to get much worst than this.dont she get it?

for me this is enough.the time is now if i want to fix this thing out.but she didn't let me in to fix the situation.i wonder why because i'm the one who causing her in trouble.yes.i cant see where should i start if she didnt let me to.maybe she thinks that i will make it much worst than she could imagine then i can fix.

that is what i need to pay when causing others to be in trouble just because of  my action.the trust wont be 100% same anymore.its been decreasing and keep on decreasing and it would be probably just 40% of trust and i hate when things turn out like this.its stop my movement most of it.

dear Allah,help me to fix this thing properly so that things could be normal once more.i wish i could turn back time by keeping this secret from her.but short thinking is what i made.i hate my self for letting things to be like this.Allah,give me some strength.i need your help right now.i cant even think what i need to do so that this thing wont be in much worst than this.i pray to YOU to give me some calmness,patient,and sanity to FIX and to take the RIGHT DECISION.only to YOU i would turn to.amin.
Terima kasih atas kesudian membaca entry saya.Like jika suka entry ini.

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